10,000 BC

I've said before that I don't like gladiator heels. But at least, on the right person, it can make them look kind of terrifyingly Amazonian.



This, however, is less Amazonian than Archaic. Which is all well and good, if the way you roll is biblical. Now, personally, if I'm going to be thrown into a colloseum to face off against a gladiator or a lion, I'd like to have appropriate footwear on. And, in my case, appropriate footwear is something I can run comfortably in. Not flip flops with cow hide stapled to them.

Bebe Marisa Leather Gladiator Sandal Boots - $179

Et Tu, Black Halo?

Friends, Romans, Readership, lend me your ears.



I come to mock clothing, not to praise it;
The ugly that designers do go to the sales rack,
the good is oft sold out before I can buy it.

So let it be with this top.

Black Halo One Shoulder Jane Top - $105

This Is Madness!

Question:

Is it just me, or does this sweater make your boobs look like they're wearing a Spartan helmet?



Topshop Foil Studded Neckline Sweat - $55

Toga to Tango

I'm not sure if Bebe was inspired by the Romans, beauty pageants, or by arm injuries. Either way, the result is the same:



The danger with wearing pockets on a dress is that you're naturally going to want to put your hands in the pockets, which looks kind of ridiculous and ruins the lines of the dress.

The danger with a sash is that you're going to use it in lieu of a purse, or to hide appetizers for later. And while yes, it would be a brilliant way to snag extra pigs in a blanket at a cocktail party ... wait, I forgot the down side. Sorry.



Oh, right. She sure does look sassy for a woman who is wearing a dress designed to look like she accidentally tucked the hem into it.

Bebe Stone Beaded Draped Halter Dress - $76.99