The Curtain Rose

So, I actually really like the rose in the center of the bust. Yes, it looks a lot like 4th of July bunting. But still, it actually kind of works for me.



Am I the only one, however, who totally thinks the ruffles down the front look like curtains? I wouldn't be shocked if, inside the dress, there's a rigging system that allows you to open and close the skirt as needed.

J.Crew Strapless Chambray Wild Rose Dress - $98

Introducing, the Chambray Jumpsuit

Thanks to Nicole for bringing this to my attention.



The Chambray Jumpsuit from American Apparel needs no introduction. It just ... is.



Combining the elastic waist of your favorite pair of mom jeans with a baggy top, the Chambray Jumpsuit offers a wildly unflattering cut. Why let yourself go when you can just give the appearance that you've let yourself go?



Not only does the elastic waistband give the impression of mom jeans, but the back of the Chambray Jumpsuit offers a similar effect. The pockets bulge outward, widening your hips so one can easily scare off predators, like the frills on those spitting dinosaurs in Jurassic Park.



How does one jazz up the Chambray Jumpsuit? With a black velvet ribbon. Obviously.



So, who wears the Chambray Jumpsuit? A woman with confidence. A woman who takes charge. A woman who works for a 70s-style sleaze bag and doesn't mind the occasional bout of sexual harassment.



A woman who enjoys taking comically large steps.

American Apparel Chambray Jumpsuit